Patently Absurd – Part I: France

Author: Vollketten

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So, I like the odd, the quirky and the unusual. Delving into the patent archives, I have come across many weird and wonderful creations and ideas and occasionally, a few stand out. In this occasional series, I’ll post up some of the tanks and military vehicles you probably never heard of and in many cases, they thankfully never got built. Part 1 here will be about France, but don’t worry – this is not all France has to offer in this regard. So, if you like these, tell me in the comments what nation you want next and I’ll see what I can find.

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A design by Pierre Montel, Gabriel Voisin and Charles Ceecaldi from 1952. Specifically for a road combat vehicle with 30-40cm of ground clearance. Interesting to me is that even after the war, the idea of a wheel-cum-track machine to make the most of tracks for off-road and wheels for on-road was still being considered novel enough to try and put into a serious military vehicle, although those crew positions look decidedly uncomfortable.

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This ‘Assault Train’ by Victor-Barthelemy Jacquet from 1944 is a serious attempt to design a vehicle capable of crossing especially high obstacles. Somehow this vehicle looks 30 years too late to me.

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This hilariously spring loaded spiked railing system which carried on the sides of a tank can be deployed to impale the enemy troops by Jeanne Labadie dates to 1940. Probably better this wasn’t even tried as its clearly not a viable concept.

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And now a serious and professional vehicle designer you may have heard of; none other than Louis Renault himself. Dating to 1939, this seemingly small tank is specifically designed to use extremely wide and very heavily armoured tracks to drive unharmed across minefields and to use the heavy tracks as armour for the vehicle by covering the majority of the frontal portion. I have to say I really really like this one.

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And this one looks downright sensible for once. An armoured command vehicle by Phillpe D’Estailleur Chanteraine, dating to 1940, with the driving space at the front and the engine directly behind. One can easily imagine a mounted weapon system being stuck in the back of this, had it been built in large numbers and I am informed that a plan for just such a tank destroyer/SPG version exists. This design was actually built and tested but did not reach production status.

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A device designed to protect tracks and following vehicles and to clear mines by Pierre Schwob from 1940 – and yet again, it’s not too silly, but 1940 wasn’t a good year for French military inventions. Even so, the Schwob system did reach testing phase in various guises by the French.

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And we go full circle to yet another wheel-cum-track idea, this time from 1939, so it was still seriously considered to have some uses. The designer here is Andre Glass.

To be continued…. ?

48 thoughts on “Patently Absurd – Part I: France

  1. That one by Louis Renault looks remotely feasible. If we can determine the gun, would there be a chance of this tank appearing as a low tier tank destroyer in the game, perhaps as a gift tank?

    Absurd track health, awful gun traverse, slow but perhaps decent traverse speeds, and horrible armor?

    Anyways, what’s Germany have to offer with the absurd tank designs? I know of the Leopard Prototype C and Krupp’s special waffentrager… is there any information on the StuG Leopard (VK 16.02)?

  2. And this one looks downright sensible for once. An armoured command vehicle by Phillpe D’Estailleur Chanteraine, dating to 1940, with the driving space at the front and the engine directly behind. One can easily imagine a mounted weapon system being stuck in the back of this, had it been built in large numbers and I am informed that a plan for just such a tank destroyer/SPG version exists. This design was actually built and tested but did not reach production status.

    That is the Lorraine 37L APC
    An SPG was developed based on this, and it is in WoT (Lorraine 39L AM)

    • There was also the Lorraine 37 Chasseur de Chars with the 47mm SA 37 gun, if that is what SS had been referring to with the SPG/TD version.

      If I recall there was even a 17 pounder mounting proposal from the Free French in the UK

      • It wasn’t SS who wrote the article. So give the creds and send your thanks to the proper NA server guy, that in his spare time unearths these wonderful jewels, so he won’t get mad and continue posting these interesting articles.
        Thx Vollketten!

  3. I have a Renault megane, its built to such a futuristic design that ensures it will not travel more than one week’s worth of journeys without something breaking. Got to love the French.

    • Ever since they stopped making the Renault 5 Turbo, they stopped making good vehicles. Shoulda realized that before you bought the Mégane lol

      • They share parts with Nissan, don’t know if Renault are better, or Nissan are worse for that.

        • Been using french cars for 12 years now, never had an issue with any of them (though I know someone who got mad at her Renault Espace). The latest DS have the same quality level as your average Mercedes or BMW, but are much cheaper.

          The electronics are faulty sometimes, but it’s not nearly as bad as they are on my MG, for example.

          • I’ve become a pretty good self trained auto spark, electric windows 3 times, wipers, numerous engine sensor replacements, bulbs with horrible access, fuses galore. Shame as the Peugeot I had previously was bulletproof reliability.

          • Did you just seriously compared an Renault with an Mercedes? -.- The Renault isn’t even close in reaching the quality level the Mercedes has for years now.

            • Yeah that s why mercedes is using renault engines for some of their cars right?
              Another brainwashed idiot, dont believe what the ads feed you.

          • Renault is known for having issues with electric/electronic cables, and the 2.2L gasoline motor of the Espace was known for being faulty…
            Apart from this, my company use a lot of their vehicles, and I had no problem so far with them…

            • My 1991 Toyota Corolla says hello to all French cars. Nothing important got replaced.

              Well, it eats oil, but I don’t need to worry when to replace it :) On the other hand, I’m probably one of few people coming to garage with an engine problem just to discover the oil filter heavily rusted. Normal people change the filter when changing oil. Well, I don’t change oil… :)

              No wonder my (new) car is the same brand.

              • The new engine with more sensors won’t be as forgiving when it comes to oil filters. You may have problems if you don’t change it. Change oil, change filter. Not a hard job to be honest.

          • “…the french electronics are not as bad as they are on my MG”
            -quote of the week :D
            You know why the brits drink warm beer? Lucas now builds refrigerators as well…

  4. i respect all these people for drawing these designs without CAD programs. i can only dream about drawing these things with pencil and ruler.

  5. The assault train looks pretty awesome. It’s high up there with the Soviets when it comes to crazy idea.

  6. “This hilariously spring loaded spiked railing system which carried on the sides of a tank can be deployed to impale the enemy troops by Jeanne Labadie dates to 1940. Probably better this wasn’t even tried as its clearly not a viable concept.”

    Unreal tournament 2004, Scorpion?

  7. “This hilariously spring loaded spiked railing system which carried on the sides of a tank can be deployed to impale the enemy troops by Jeanne Labadie dates to 1940. Probably better this wasn’t even tried as its clearly not a viable concept.”

    You might laugh at it but if the enemy infantry tries to get on your tank it would be a good defence system.

    “And we go full circle to yet another wheel-cum-track idea, this time from 1939, so it was still seriously considered to have some uses. The designer here is Andre Glass.”

    That system has actually been used on a few obscure machines.

  8. This engineer was on to something, see “Bandvagn 202″. The concept is basically the same.

  9. US has a lot of crazy ideas for tanks, like a self drilling foxhole tank and a tank made from an actual water tank. Contact me on the US Forums if you want help finding these crazy contraptions. Name is same on the forums.

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