WoT Platoon with a Girl? That will be 12 Euro, please

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Thanks to Dejv for this one.

When it comes to World of Tanks, there is not a whole lot that would surprise me. Or make me smile in amusement, because I have this stupid feeling that I’ve just seen it all. Yet, from time to time, there are things that prove me wrong. This is one of them.

Ever heard of powerlevelling services? I assume that you did, if you ever played other MMO’s, such as World of Warcraft. But, just to make sure, here’s what it actually is: “powerlevelling” is usually a service, where you pay another person to play your game account for you in order to reach some goal (for example level up, or, in WoT, unlocking a branch, getting certain amount of credits and so on). In order to do that, that person needs access to your account, so you can imagine how giving anyone your username (e-mail) and password is NOT a good idea – don’t EVER try it, 99,9 percent of such offers are scams. As a part of such service, the site usually also sells “high level accounts” – you can imagine how are they getting them.

But, back to our surprising case. There is this site, called http://wot-leveling.com/. It’s oriented on Russian server, so I won’t be doing them any favours by disclosing their existence to predominantly EU and US server readers.

The site, when you look at it, looks fairly good, professional even – it’s up to date, has references and the usual internet crap. Again, just to be sure – do NOT ever use such services, you’ve been warned, if you do anyway and lose your account, you deserve it.

If you think powerlevelling is innocent and does nothing to harm other players, think again. Those aren’t unicums driving around grinding credits, those are (in best case) “10k battles 40 winrate” players we all love, in worst case bots (even IF the powerlevelling service is not an outright scam, nothing stops them from employing bots and if your account gets banned, yea, tough luck). Anyway, this is not why I am writing this. This site offers one special service, that actually made me giggle:

Platoon with a Girl

devush

You pay 600 rubles (cca 12 Euro) to play 10 battles with a girl as your platoon mate, or 1000 rubles (21 Euro) for two girl platoon members (for 10 battles). Chatting with them is included :D The service provider claims that the following is a part of the service:

- communicating with the girl or girls
- learning to improve your skills
- improvement of tactical thinking
- getting the info on various tricks on various maps
- fine details of strategy and game mechanisms
- improvement of the game winrate

I mean…. wow.

At first I actually laughed a lot. Then I facepalmed, thinking something like…

cc3a8e6b7e8fdb400efb30150402ba57

And then I realized this is actually fucking genius! Do you know how many desperate neckbeards or horny kids with dad’s credit cards are playing? Or just statwankers, who would try to make an impression on the girls with a few virtual numbers?

This is probably the best business idea related to WoT I’ve ever seen. And it’s not even illegal. Not this part anyway. Unless it’s a scam too. But seriously, if this was actually a real service, some gamer girls could make a shitload of cash on something like that on EU and US servers as well. Just, you know… webcam, playing in bra or something – the usual Twitch stuff, with a video recording of them playing with the player and talking to him so the player can replay the… ehm… “technical advice they give him”… :D

Either way, this is just hilarious :)

140 thoughts on “WoT Platoon with a Girl? That will be 12 Euro, please”

  2. I had a laugh. I never expected anything like this. But still doesn’t really surprise me.

  3. You mean like that cheap slut Jaqueline (no idea if spelled right?) streaming on twitch and having tons of desperate unicum fanboys? I’m sure she’s making lots of money with ads and donations as well. “Private sessions” are the next step (or being entirely topless, since last time I saw her she showed as much of her boobs as twitch allows people to).

    She doesn’t even speak English and totally ignores the viewers. The only reason why she has a webcam on her stream is to bait all the desperate morons… and the worst thing is, it fucking works.

      • http://www.twitch.tv/jacqueline_wot

        There you go. You should recognize lots of unicum names in her chat whenever she streams.

        Funny thing is, she uses (or used to use) hitzone skins, foliage removers, full gold ammo spam, OP tanks and other stuff. Every other player would get flamed into the ground for doing that, but since she’s a girl showing her boobs and looking somewhat pretty into the camera nobody minds it and they all praise her. Whenever I read the chat there or read stuff about her in “Elitist Channel” (platoons for unicums) I don’t know whether I’m supposed to laugh or cry.

          • well she’s not using any of the retarded mods anymore and her batchat carries 25 APCR and 5 HEAT. And she speaks English (although it’s nothing interesting).

            She improved! Amazing. lol

                • He actually didn’t know he was using a defoliant mod. He genuinely thought it was part of the game settings (he lowered them at the same time he tested a new modpack). I was going to report him (I took like 30 screenshots of his stream), but he wanted to prove me wrong by getting to his old settings to show how the foliage will reappear but it didn’t work. He then turned off WOT, tried to find a mod that could cause that and when he didn’t find it he reinstalled completely. A few minutes later a mod banned him for 1h (he happened to be watching the stream?) to give him time to delete the illegal mod or do a clean reinstall if necessary.

                • 1 hour for illegal mods? That sounds pretty odd, usually it’s much more. BTW white corpses are allowed? I thought they weren’t…

                • White corpses are only banned by ESL, not by Wargaming.

                  And he was banned for 1h only, because the mod watched all the talk in chat and OldSkools reaction in stream and I don’t think he was acting. He’s a German streamer and lots of German forumites and people from eu-comm (the one with the bothunter, in case you don’t remember) watch him daily. Nobody in the center of attention like him would be retarded enough to use illegal mods on stream.

                  Sela only did it, because he thought the mods weren’t banned on WG NA, because there was no official list. OldSkool and all his viewers are very well aware of what’s legal and what is not.

                • Xensation, if he is that popular (odd thing, I checked his Twitch channel and he has like zero past streams), why does he use language such as “die you jew go to Auschwitz” – or, rather, how come the German community tolerates that?

                • I don’t know and I don’t approve of such insults at all. I don’t think anyone really does. The problem is most people simply don’t know about it. There’s what? 27 – 29 random people in every battle of his and a maximum of 5 of them do actually speak English. Saying such things a few times won’t make a huge audience hate you all of a sudden.

                  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a fan or good friend of his at all. I only know him from the forums and played in tank companies with him twice (once about 2 years (?) ago and the 2nd time was yesterday).

                  I don’t approve of illegal mods which is why I was going to report him the other day when he was using the defoliant. However, it was quite obviously an accident and he didn’t even know he had an illegal modification. I could have gotten him banned for a few weeks, maybe a month (or permanently?), by reporting him (and making other people report him as well), but there’s no point in getting someone banned who isn’t guilty.

                  I’d appreciate if you kept naming and shaming racists, nazis and all that other stuff and OldSkool might very well be guilty in this case, but please don’t make him look like a cheater. He played a grand total of like 3 – 5 (?) battles with that mod. If you want to name and shame cheaters I think you should stick with people who have been known to use illegal mods for ages or got caught with using them on purpose.

                  Examples:
                  - Sela (popular NA streamer), used illegal mods and even included them in his modpack until I reported him and he got banned. Other people warned him, but he ignored it, because he said WG NA didn’t ban any mods.
                  - BK1 (high ranked member of FAME), he asked in a cheat forum (not sure where, I saw a screenshot of it) how to make the mod work and complained that the mod devs scammed him, because the mod is broken. It was about some kind of special defoliant, if I remember correctly. He was smart enough to use the same name, lol.
                  - Redneck and others, the devs of the XVM mod. They have a special forum for all kinds of cheat mods and they’re always trying to develop new and better illegal features for XVM there.

                • “He actually didn’t know he was using a defoliant mod. He genuinely thought it was part of the game settings”

                  may i remind you guys that he’s hosting in a modpack? i know he has limited skills regarding mods, but really – that bad?

                • a lot. he is hosting his mod pack for quite some time now and should by now be able to distinguish modification from feature right from the start. normally, after some time working with your own mod pack, you know how certain mods work, even the illegal ones. if you are doing research for mods and such you WILL stumble upon them, especially when you visit russian sites. well, you just need to follow plazmakeks blog (SS wrote about him some time ago) and you will find plenty of illegal modifications along with screenshots showing them “in action”.

                  so, if the situation was like you said above, he was either acting or is actually quite incompetent – imho.

                • I hope you realize you can make a modpack without having a clue about that stuff whatsoever. All you need is find the mods created by others, make a simple script that extracts them into res_mods and share it with the world.

            • Oh god I just clicked the channel and 6th sense popped right up… what the hell is this all about?!

              • she fucking camps everywhere and snipes, I called her start position 3 games in a row. If there had ever been a decent arty on the map, she would have been fucking dead in 30 seconds.

                • The most stale games i ever saw were games with unicum players. When a few are on each side it’s fine, but when half the teams are unicum, 8/10 times it ends in a draw.

                • To her defence, carrying only increases the WR, not the WN. And her WN is very good.
                  The fact is that she is a better player than 99% of the playerbase.

                • Spam gold + camp a lot for WN8 and get carried in platoons for okayish win ratio. If she played like that without platoons she’d maybe be at like 54%

                • @Ville Turpeinen

                  Platooning can also increase WN8.

                  You are not alone, so in many cases you survive longer and you are able to make more damage. (alone against 2 enemies and with platoonmate against 2 enemies makes huge difference) Even if your team sucks like hell, you will not be 1 against 5-6 or 10 enemies, there will be more of you which allow you to take more shots in most cases. If heavily damaged, you can keep behind platoonmates who will shield you. Also “horny boys” from platoon can spot for you :) And you will snipe, snipe, snipe. While playing solo it is much harder to make good wn8 (specialy when you are such retard like me who will probably never learn not to keep whole flank alone or to take risk to help some noob who is suiciding).

        • she ain’t exactly pretty.. maybe she does have a nice body (is there a full body pic around?).. but the face is not really worth looking at, and that’s me being nice.

          • Xen talking about getting carried in Randoms thats pretty ironic or how did you get 75% WR… and maybe you also camp behind and let others do the work who knows….

            • I wouldn’t get 75% without carrying my own weight, so I’m not getting carried, I am carrying myself and my platoon mates are helping me carry the retards.

    • She’s pretty. Waiting for some private sessions. My dad left me the credit card for the weekend :D

      • Yeah, she is one of the more pathetic streamers. How kids are attracted to her streams is just amazing. Hot girl, must play with her…
        Attention whore, nothing more…

        • And let’s be honest everyone watches EJ for the nipples and not for the gameplay. He is only playing the op mediums like Jacqueline and is spamming Gold….no skill

  4. For the people that visit Twitch often, you might have heard of a ”girl gamer” named Kaceytron, who is blessed with a giant rack of breasts. She is absolutely retarded and obnoxious to the point that even a blind bat can tell that she’s trolling and acting you’d think.

    Well…Not really.

    She gets tons of donation, she get tons of hate, tons of trolling and tons of admiration from the same people you described, SS. Ergo: She’s trolling her viewers hard, showing excessive amount of cleavage ”even though she has self respect” and still gets a ton of donation from horny fanboys, evne though she is a plump midget with boobs that are scary. Well played i’d say.

  6. Articles like these reminds me why in contrast to general WoT players, I actually like FTR’s community and readers. Above average bullshit detectors and generally a more pleasant tone. Also, no tolerance for retards, boobs or not.

      • SS – You forgot the “yellow journalism”….

        anyway… WTF is “yellow journalism”…..Is it “yellow-bellied” or “piss-yellow”…??

        Someone had it #tagged in their wot-sig along with my very own #StatsMeanNothing™ slogan, so I feel suitably honoured now… I have achieved recognition… I am At One…

        ..although I am slightly miffed that they didn’t format it correctly in Bold, Blue, Times New Roman….

        I was going to ask him but he seemed to have some issue with me as well…

        :)

  8. Oh by the way, I have like a dozen girls in my friends list I can platoon with whenever I want. Maybe we should start a business and I’ll become a WOT pimp? lol

        • screw you nigga, I can use nigga as much as nigga wants, right, nigga

          Get burned.

          • IMHO…. using “nigga” is fine when its a “normal phrase”.. such as the “dayum nigga”… or “ma niggaz man….

            However….”nigger” is different…

            Xen… I know about 4 girls in game.. .
            ..although 1 is married to another player.. does that affect the price?
            ……and if so, upwards or downwards.. is there a “cuckold” premium..??

    • @Xen: If you need some marketing help, I’m good with that. On the other hand internet-boobs to a <18y audience should sell like warm bread anyways… :-P

  9. Ok, i think I just found a second job for my wife playing WoT. :)) The idea is pure genius.

  11. I can just see the flash ads now…”Girls with >2000 EFF are waiting to talk to YOU! They’re sick of tier sevens, they want MEN!!!”

  12. “And then I realized this is actually fucking genius! Do you know how many desperate neckbeards or horny kids with dad’s credit cards are playing? Or just statwankers, who would try to make an impression on the girls with a few virtual numbers”
    Hahaha!! This quote made me actually laugh! ;)

  15. *facepalm*

    Powerlevelling; bane of my life. I made the same service for some random veggie n00bs on WoT a while ago and the result was shitload of cash for my PayPal account.

    And this Jacqueline bitch… She’s looking like a slut from one of German porn channels. :)

      • *ring, ring, ring* It’s not that hard to find West European people fucking each other… Especially in France. ;)

  17. Noooooo ss what have you done? Look at all these evil(badass) ideas sprouting!

  19. If you only chat with the girls and don’t actually see them live, you could use ugly and fat chicks (but never both ’cause fat ugly chicks usually have trucker voices) and have an even fatter profit margin…hmmm…

  21. 12€ for 10 games how expensive, but wait…
    I play with my girlfriend, I have to pay 4:
    Flat, electricity, Internet, second pc, food, water, …

    Wait 12€ sound relaly cheap! ;-)

  22. In most cases powerleveling in games has nothing to do with using players account by someone else. For example in MMO RPG’s people pay higher level players for making with them some raids to help them level faster, get game money or some valuable items. Such services are also often made for free in guilds (clans).

    In WoT it could be paying for being in platoon with some good player/players.

    • “In most cases powerleveling in games has nothing to do with using players account by someone else. For example in MMO RPG’s people pay higher level players for making with them some raids to help them level faster, get game money or some valuable items. Such services are also often made for free in guilds (clans).”

      That is almost never true. Not sure what games you have experience in, but WoW worked exactly how I described.

      • That’s basically because all later MMORPGs made it virtually impossible to powerlevel, or even pointless. In WoW, buying a blue weapon from the AH made more sense than following a low level around and keeping the health up, and that was basically all the powerleveling you could do. It was nowhere near EQ levels.

      • Lotro, AoC, SWTOR. In all these games I know cases that people hired other players with real or game money for playing together to level faster.

        And I have never heard there about giving others account to play, cause you are too lazy to grind smth alone :) Must be some WoW specific (never played that game)

        • It was common in WoW at one point, a lot of people lost their account because of this. I’ve never heard of a service of buying someone to follow you around, sounds terrible ineffective to me, not illegal though.

          • It can be very effective :). You go to 6-man instance for level 45 as level 40, you hire one lvl 80 or 95 (ie top level) . He makes that instance very very fast, you get XP for all mobs and quests, Repeat, repeat and so on – can be 4 times faster leveling then with normal questing. For me totally pointless, but have seen people doing it.

            In Lotro can be even funnier cause you can set your character to follow such hired of befriended top level. You character automatically moves behind him and gets xp, cash, and loot while you can be in cinema with gf :)

          • Sometimes you could get a high level player to escort you through areas with mobs that would usually kill you with one hit, if you tap the monster and they kill it, you get all the xp and level up faster. Usually they would expect you to either pay them (like a couple hundred gold, more if you were in the higher levels), or they would take all the loot, anything to scrounge up enough gold to buy some piece of super inflated gear in the AH that sells for like 5.8 mil gold.

          • in games with strong buffs you can cast without restriction (haste, damage shields) and heals, having a high level powerlevel you is incredibly effective, as you go through even strong monsters like a hot knife through butter.

            Modern games eliminated these mechanics, at the cost of having interesting buffs of course. But then again, the MMORPG Genre is fucking dead and boring now, with everyone cloning WoW still.

  23. i have actually nothing against girl streamers showing some cleavage,they dont do anything else than models or actually a lot of other girls do (i have watched jaqueline she is pretty but boring)

    what makes me sad is watching ppl in f.e. jaquelines chat – its unbelievable how low can some guys go…the exact same guys who act all tough and dont mind call you out for having just 1 wn8 worse stats than them from known clans,just a bunch of pathetic human beings.if i ever fall so low pls shoot me

    • Yes, spent like 15 minutes just reading the chat there today after Xen linked it, I was quite honestly surprised at some of the… I don’t really know how to call it… groveling? No such thing on Rita channel.

      • I never watched a livestream of her. Is the chat that – uhm – disturbing? I watched one of her E-100 videos some time ago. Wasn’t very exciting and – no offense – I’d rather watch a halfway decent 1500 WN player who is fun and entertaining than an attention-seeking unicum who camps and spams gold. ;-)

        • let me put it this way,if you want to watch someone for gameplay i see no reason to watch her…

          if you feel the need to watch a pretty girl on cam playing tanks,by all means go for it,she is not annoying or anything like kaceytron (i just find her boring probably because she doesnt speak english well enough to be either funny or informative) and the chat can be sometimes unbearable because of whiteknights – understandable considering she is a girl

          • Ok, thanks for the info. Then I probably don’t have to watch her stream. I can imagine more interesting “girl plays with toys” moments than “girl plays WoT hurr durr”. ;-)

  24. Yeah, f.e. Rita is way (!) more interesting to watch and doesn’t need to show off certain bodyparts to get an audience. ;-)

  27. Lolwut? Half of my friends list are girls and i have no problem platooning…

    I have to admit though, that girls are statistically worse players. Still, i feel somewhat less strain platooning with them :P . Like feeling less competitive? Maybe because i’m not soo good player, too ;) .

  28. I bet she does livejasmin, myfreecam etc too! let’s find her guys! lmao xD

  30. For 20€ you can have private platoon session with me, mighty Orfiel from [PAVA]! Unknown from random battles all around the EU servers, famous for not hitting immobile targets 10 meters away and holder of the 2nd place in first ever Platoon Wars by Highflyer15.

    Session include:

    - 26 year old Finnish male not appearing nude for you
    - Above average offensive “balls-deep-to-shit” aggressive gameplay with a lot of swearing
    - Choice of English or exotic Finnish communication in our very own voice-com server
    - Bad jokes and racist comments about better players who exploit my own mistakes
    - Possibility of me abandoning you into your own certain death if I get panic attack or forget that I’m suppose to play for my platoon
    - 2 choice picture of kittens stolen from the internet (provide email address for delivery)
    - Promise of slight WN and WR padding, session winrate guaranteed to be over 50% (we play as long as it’s past treshold)
    - If you see my nipples – money back guarantee!

    Please let me contact you as soon as possible. Let me to have you to help me make money!

    SPECIAL: With 5€ more you’ll can enjoy company of one more player of our clan! 100% increase in bad jokes and raging! Only valid for the next 2 hours!

  31. Man what a genius idea, 1 euro per battle for platooning with a super unicum and have him mentoring you. I would totally sell myself out.

  32. OMFG Xen… Thats was mean… Iam not going to argue if the stream bcoz its not my taste in terms of entertainment…

    But you went imho overboard alot calling her a slut…

    One main aspect I noticed… She always streams with like 5 kg makeup… I mean… Why the fuck? Such a pretty face doesnt needs so much make up in the first place.

    • Not to defend Xen, but completely disregarding her personality or whatever (I don’t know her), once I opened her stream, I immediately had the same impression. Then I checked her past streams whether it’s a constant trend and yes, she wears very… revealing things.

      I mean, as a straight guy, I am fine with that, but it’s also an insane attention grab, good streamers don’t need that.

  33. 12 € for 10 Games?

    Can play WoT and other things with my Girlfriend for free xD

  34. Silent and Xen you guys are being very harsh in your judgement.
    Yes she uses her look to attract people to her stream— I AGREE
    BUT you can not put her together with the tipical streaming bimbo who JUST uses her looks to get donations. Don`t forget she is a Unicum, she is better than 99% of the players, she knows how to play so there is not just form without substance there.

    Yes her stream can be bland if you consider her comentary—I AGREE

    BUT consider she is at the beginning. I think she will be more outspoken with time as she get`s used to streaming on a regular basis.
    You mentioned Rita. She was as boring and bland at the beginning of her streaming days until she got comfortable with streaming( I`m just comparing the COMMENTARY part here, NOTHING ELSE; I`m not saying that Rita used her looks to make her stream more appealing as Jacky does)

  35. The by far worst part about these streams is the horrible shit pop music these people apparently can endure 24/7

  36. I don’t know what’s wrong with you people. She looks great! However all girls I’ve played with have turned out to be completely incompetent. And I highly doubt she is different in that aspect.